Chartbreaker 10-11-10

Happy Columbus Day everyone. Last week, I didn’t put out a Chartbreaker. The reason why is because I usually look at the charts on Monday and that gives me until Thursday to put out the Chartbreaker. Thursday is when the new chart comes out. I didn’t see it until Tuesday and started writing on Wednesday. I didn’t finish it and by the next day, it was too late. But this time, I’m on the ball and ready to look at a very very whacked out hot 100 chart.

91. “Power” by Kanye West f/ Dwele

The song may be on the way out but I don’t think that this is the last we will see of this song, not after Kanye’s SNL spectacle. If you haven’t seen it, allow me to try to describe it. Someone gave Kanye the license to do his performance up as he pleased. So, there was none of the classic train station background. It was just white. And there was Kanye, dressed in red, wearing a gold laurel leaf crowd atop a staircase. Below him are white sheets which are billowing and then reveal about 20 women in white bodysuits, writhing. There are people doing ballet on pedestals. One woman is just lounging, like a cat sprawled on the top of a sofa, at the front of the screen. I would continue but I fear I cannot do this madness justice. I have to give it to Kanye for attempting to make his performance into art but this was wacky.

88. “Hope She Cheats On You (with a Basketball Player)” by Marsha Ambrosius

Marsha Ambrosius used to be one half of the group Floetry and since then she has been songwriting for others like Kelis and Alicia Keyes and doing appearances on songs like Justin Timberlake’s “Cry Me a River”. Now she has her solo return with this very specific tune. It’s not just I hope she cheats on you. It’s hoping for a basketball player or an “NFL baller”. It’s a little odd. Then there are lines like “Don’t know the difference ‘tween a touchdown and a layup”. Huh? If that’s some sort of mixed metaphor, I don’t get it. There’s all these mixed sports references and i’m just shaking my head.Plus, the song is born out of bitterness.

78.  “Anything Like Me” by Brad Paisley

As a New Yorker, everytime I turn on the charts, I seem to learn something new about the very foreign world of Country music. This time, I learned about Bard Paisley. At first, I took Brad Paisley as something less than serious. The first song of his I had paid any attention to was “Water”, a song that talked about wonderous things like wet t-shirt contests. But then I checked out this guy’s discography. Every single one of his singles have hit the top 100 charts and that’s going back to 1999. Holy crap. The guy has 27 hit songs, 17 #1 singles (on the country charts) and I didn’t hear of him until he got a song in Rock Band. Funny how things like that happen.

My Chemical Romance

Debuting at #77, My Chemical Romance's "Na Na Na"

75. “Bill Gates” by Li’l Wayne, 65. “I Am Not A Human Being” by Li’l Wayne, 42. “What’s Wrong With Them” by Li’l Wayne, 39. “Right Above It” by Li’l Wayne, 17. “Gonorrhea” by Li’l Wayne

Still in jail. Yes, but he’s got a new album out and it’s all over the hot 100. I gotta say, this album has some tremendous song titles. First up, you’ve “Bill Gates”, which rhymes “hatin” with “Bill Gate-in”. Then there’s “I Am Not A Human Being”, the title track. There’s “What’s Wrong With Them” which features Nicki Overexposed Minaj; and “Right Above It” which features the almost overexposed Drake. Okay, those two are lackluster titles but you can’t beat a title like “Gonorrhea”. That being said, I can really do without a chorus like “pussy ass nigga, i don’t want your gonorrhea”. Really?  That lyric has created a top 20 hit. **Shakes head**.

58. “Roll With It” by Easton Corbin

I’m always fascinated by songwriters. I’ve written about Dr. Luke on several occasions and his domination of the pop music world. I often wondered if it was the same way in other genres. Country always seemed like a genre built for singer-songwriters, so I was a little surprised to see that this song wasn’t penned by Easton Corbin. A little more research and I found that it was done by a trio of country hit writers. There’s Tony Lane, whose written for Randy Travis, Chris Ledoux and many others; David Lee, whose penned for Montgomery Gentry, Trace Adkins and Faith Hill; and Johnny Park. Part of me is excited to see that. As a lyricist, I enjoy writing songs for others. At the same point, it breaks my rose colored view of the country artist who is bringing their particular worldview to life with their records.

37. “September” by Daughtry, 31. “If I Had You” by Adam Lambert, 77. “Mama’s Song” by Carrie Underwood

Over the last few weeks, I have heard Nigel Lythgoe talk alot about American Idol and how they need to create a new idol, almost saying that the show had failed to make a true star recently. They are reworking the whole concept with new judges Steven Tyler (can you believe he’s in his 60’s) and Jennifer Lopez and they are going to change how the artists can present themselves, whatever that means. I understand the need for change in the wake of Cowell and DeGeneres leaving but I don’t get the failure talk as I look on the charts and see Glambert hanging in the top 40, Daughtry racing up the charts and Underwood debuting her 13th hit single. If they thought they would get more hitmakers from the sea of contestants, they’re delusional. Not everyone is built for stardom.

25. “The Only Exception” by Paramore, 26. “The Only Exception” by Glee Cast

In some weird kismet, the Lea Michele cover of Paramore’s big ballad debuted on the chart, right below the original. Now, I only listed the one Glee song there. There are a ton more of them on the chart. (After all those Li’l Wayne songs, I was tired on looking all over the chart.) It is a sad state of affairs that Glee now has more hit records than the Beatles. I’m not going to say that the members of the Glee cast don’t work hard but it’s essentially a tribute band scoring hit records. And they are disposable hits too because Glee songs don’t last more than 2 weeks on the charts. It’s another head shaker on another whacked out Billboard chart.

21. “Fuck You” by Cee-Lo Green

This song debuted on the UK chart at #1. US, what is taking so long! Don’t be such prudes. Embrace the Fuck You.

15. “Animal” by Neon Trees, 2. “Like a G6” by Far East Movement f/ The Cataracts & Dev

I am very excited that “Like a G6” is the #2 song in the country. It’s kind of a slow week in the top 20 with lingering Katy Perry tunes, a Glee song, a Li’l Wayne song, that ridiculous Mike Posner song still hanging around, more of the usual suspects (Taio Cruz, Ke$ha, Taylor Swift, Usher, Eminem), and Bruno Mars is still sitting at the top. It’s nice to have something a bit different in the mix. I’m happily surprised to see Neon Trees bringing a very new wave sound in the top 20, while Far East Movement, et al. bring a mix of rap and electronica. Usually I can be a little negative about the charts but these two songs being hits make me happy.

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